So... What the shit is going on in Ohio?

"Dan Capeci" (lastws6)
04/12/2015 at 21:47 • Filed to: None

Somebody has been crapping on, and in, a bunch of cars. 19 of them to be exact. All the incidents have taken place in the Kenmore neighborhood of Akron OH in the last three years.

According to Cleavland.com:

"Some residents had their car pooped on multiple times...."

"In nine of the cases, including once on Jan. 22, the person whose car was pooped on did not want to make a full police report. They instead wanted to alert police patrolling the area."

What causes one to want to do this? I have owned, and seen, some cars that are truly shitty, but I never even thought about actually shitting on them.

I take that back. One time at a huge junkyard in a swamp in eastern PA, I had to go, bad. I think I was just so excited because I found the heater controls for my Spitfire. I used the trunk of a K-car with no floor. The height was right, and, well....K-car.

I could possibly see if he had a vendetta against one model of car, or even an entire make. But the list of cars the Mad Shitter has abused just makes no sense:

Here is a synopsis of the police reports:

"Oct. 15, 2014: A 19-year-old man told police someone defecated on the hood of his car and smeared the poop across the hood and on the handles of his 2002 Chevrolet Cavalier parked in the 2800 block of Cory Avenue.

July 15, 2014: A 30-year-old man reported that someone pooped on the hood of his 1991 Chevrolet Camaro and smeared it across his hood and passenger side mirror. The car was parked in the 800 block of Carnegie Avenue.

Dec. 3, 2013: The father of a 16-year-old girl reported that someone pooped on his daughter's car for the third time. The car was parked in the 1000 block of Carnegie.

Oct. 1, 2013: A 25-year-old woman reported someone put feces on the hood of her 2002 Toyota Celica that was parked in the 1200 block of Carnegie Avenue. The woman told police it was the third time she found poop on her car.

Sept. 4, 2013: A 43-year-old woman reported someone pooped on the hood of 2003 Chevrolet Cavalier and smeared it on the door handles. The car was parked in the 1000 block of Carnegie Avenue.

Aug. 14, 2013: The same 25-year-old woman from the Oct. 1 report told police someone defecated on her car parked at the same location.

Dec. 19, 2012: A 32-year-old woman reported that someone threw feces on the hood of her 2002 Mitsubishi Galant parked in the 1300 block of Carnegie.

Dec. 5, 2012: The same woman from the Dec. 19 report told police someone put feces on the hood of her car.

May 15, 2012: A 27-year-old man reported that someone pooped on the passenger side door of his 2000 Toyota Celica. The man told police this was the second time he found someone pooped on his car. "The excrement did not cause any damage to the car," the police report says, "but it did cause a big mess." "

So there you um... go. No rhyme or reason to it. Oh and someone got a picture of the guy: